Baby Beating

My fingers played on her tiny back with gentle strokes. “Close your eyes,” I used what I hoped was a soothing voice. She turned her head to the other side.  I tried brushing the hair away from her face, pulling it behind her ear. “Shhhh.”


She shot up onto her hands and knees, impishly grinning.  “Arf, arf! I’m a puppy!”  Her head nuzzled against my palm. “Arf!”

One of my eyebrows contorted. Just one eyebrow.  I think the other one is a lemon; it malfunctions all the time and doesn’t obey. I looked carefully at my little toddler, beams of energy streaming from every orifice. The window of naptime had vanished into the Void.  That’s the place I am sure lost things end up.  My enemy (Time) is really twisted like that. If Time wasn’t all warped, it would shove my nemesis (Fat Food) into the Void, instead.

My pointer and middle finger morphed into miniature legs and ran toward her tummy. She squealed, flying backwards onto the bed. Her dimples popped as my magical creature tickled her everywhere in carefully timed spurts.  I laid side by side with the little lady, one arm still slung toward her armpit.

A blurry limb appeared high in my peripheral vision. A small fist descended toward my face in slow-motion as I attempted to fling my arms up. My left eye exploded in a white light as I let out a scream. “Ahhhh!”

A few wussy tears later, my baby launched herself onto my exposed stomach and I nearly folded in half.  She kissed my eyeball (funny, how favors are returned so quickly).

Supermom is officially a panty.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s